Chalk up another one for Mrs. Hillbilly Mom's Never Ever List.
Right after lunch, within five minutes of starting class, I smelled an odor. My students have been warned about smelling up my classroom. I stopped what I was doing.
"Why do I smell an odor?"
"What kind of odor?"
"It wasn't here a minute ago. It's like nail polish. Something strong."
"We don't smell anything."
"Yeah. It's me."
Buffy had moved away, and just returned a couple of weeks ago. She was sitting all alone in a row by the wall, her cohorts being in turn absent and in In-School Suspension. Buffy agreeably took the rap. She was right under my nose. She and I both knew it was not her.
"I've told you people not to smell up my room. Now I'm stuck with it. I'm going to start coughing. I just got over being sick, you know. I hope you're happy. Now I'm going to have to open a window. And since I'm right in front of it, I'll get a chill. Way to go, you guys."
"I got sprayed with something earlier."
"It's not you. You would have stunk up the room from the beginning. This just started."
"We don't smell it."
"I'll figure it out."
At the end of class, we had a few minutes left. Miss Tardy said, "Would this be a good time to finish my nails?" She set out three bottles of nail polish on her desk. "I have Cherry Red, Pronto Purple, and Blue Streak."
"I KNEW somebody had nail polish. NO! Now would NOT be a good time to FINISH your nails! Why would anybody think that was permissible? I TOLD you all at the beginning of the year not to get out anything that smells, or put on make-up during my class."
"Oh. I wasn't listening to you."
"You are not doing yourself any favors here."