Monday, July 5, 2010

Procrastination, Thy Name Is Hillbilly Mom

Well, well, well. It seems that one Mrs. Hillbilly Mom has put off writing on her blog once again. Now it is late, and I am not in the mood. Shame on me. I've had all day, and nothing to show you for it.

Don't hate the blogger, hate the blog. How can I be expected to keep up with it when I'm on summer vacation? It seems like only yesterday that the lion's share of my thyroid was ripped out, then there was the Missifreakinsippi Heat Wave Vacation, then all that driving of the #1 son to and fro with his basketball open gym and our Sprint phone adventure, and now The Pony has become a 20-hour project for my niece to experiment on, hopefully with reading, and not a staph infection.

This morning, I had to shoo Farmer H out of the Mansion, because even though he ran off early as usual, he returned at 10:00 and plopped himself on the couch while I was trying to hear Hot Topics on The View. I'm not really a fan, seeing as how Whoopi hurts my eyes because she is without a doubt the ugliest woman on TV, unless you count Shelley Duvall when The Shining is on, and Joy is an annoying, self-righteous blowhard, and poor Sherri is just box-o'-rocks dumb, and Elisabeth was never on my favorite list, even on Survivor 2: Australian Outback, when I simply wished she would starve to death and spare the world her fashion shoe line. Thank the Gummi Mary, crypt-keeper Barbara is off to still her beating heart for a while, because somebody (cough-Bill Geddes-cough) forgot to tell her it is 2010 and not 1940, for cryin' out loud. But I DO like a good catfight every now and then, and these gals do not disappoint.

After booting Farmer H, found an Intervention marathon, which of course needed watching, and I had to take a break to drive the boys to town for The Pony's reading project with the niece. By the time I got back, it was 3:30, which meant time to pat out some hamburgers and shuck some roastin' ears to boil later and carve up some strawberries so things would be ready when Farmer H decided to come out of his air-conditioned BARn, where I found him after leaving him mowing the front 20 when I left for town, in order to fire up the Weber to grill supper.

Of course, while I was in the kitchen, I noticed that a Silent Library marathon was going on MTV. You can't pass up spending the afternoon in the Silent Library. By the time supper was over, it was 7:00, and then I had to go back and read some of Hillbilly Mom's Greatest Hits, if by Greatest Hits you can imagine past posts on my older incarnations that I cleverly call Hillbilly Mansion One thru Hillbilly Mansion Four. Not that I had time to read all of them, by cracky, because ol' Hillbilly Mom is quite prolific in her prose and time does not permit a complete reading in one sitting.

And that's how it came to be so late in the evening. But rest assured, I did not step outside to smoke myself a J.

No comments: