Friday, February 25, 2011

Can You Keep A Secret?

Rumor has it that we're going to revamp the password process at work next year. It's not so much a rumor as it is a district-wide email. But who wants to read about a district-wide email? I had to fish you in first, then set the record straight.

Apparently, a password with caps and numbers isn't secure enough. We will be thwarting hackers with a sentence, by cracky! A sentence! But it can't be too long. And it has to have capitals and spaces and characters and numbers.

Sweet Gummi Mary! We are not the Denver Mint. We do not have the detailed record of creation of a certain world leader of high profile stashed away in the safe, next to our extensive collection of Ferlin Husky memorabilia. We do not hold the secret recipe for Coca Cola. The code to initiate global nuclear destruction is not within our grasp. We are a public school. A small one, at that. Nobody wants to access our records. They are already public, for those who need to know. Aside from a disgruntled student, or a gruntled student with poor grades, no one is interested in our junk.

I foresee mass chaos on a district-wide scale. How many passwords will we need? We can't use our sentence for other passwords, because a sentence is too freakin' loooooooong. Seriously. How many passwords do you think a teacher can remember? We're lucky to remember to comb our hair with a fork before first bell.

I call shenanigans! Somebody needs to get a job with the eff bee eye.


knancy said...

Ha! More government BS. IMHO, stolen data has less to do with passwords than it does some stupid administrative/management type person leaving wide open files on their laptop that is stolen out of their car or seat at a bar after work. However, the positive side of this will be all the informative sentence passwords that one can formulate to enlighten the IT Department of this next stage of ascending stupidity. Have fun! Can’t wait to hear some of your possible password sentences!

Jennifer said...

Good Lord.. I would so be lost.

I have a hard enough time remember what I change my password to on my home computer and programs!

To go and change to a sentence??? And remember that on top of my favorite well liked handy dandy all around password?

Who is smoking what in that school district?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Don't tempt my with those possible password sentences. I am trying really hard to reign in my pissed-offedness.

Maybe someone NEEDS to smoke something and let us all alone for a while.

I see no reason to reinvent the wheel every day, other than to proclaim that you reinvented the wheel, and are the best wheel reinventer evah.

labbie1 said...

Sweet Gummi Mary...

LOVE IT!!!! Does that count as a sentence??? Hmmm... ;-)

Hillbilly Mom said...

According to the guidelines, it's too long. Which kind of takes the starch out of a sentence. I can't write a sentence short enough.

I hope we all don't try "Jesus wept."

labbie1 said...

Perhaps you can just use "techies suck"? LOL Mr. Labbie being one of those computer techie geeks. :)