Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Infant Female Lexicon

I need to rant about a personal pet peeve today. The subject irks me. The very idea of it makes me want to heave. If you are of a different opinion, get your own blog and refute me, by cracky! And now, for the unveiling of the peeve...

grown-a$$ people who refer to other grown-a$$ people with the diminutive "
Baby Girl."

I can't stand that. It churns my stomach. There's something pervy about it that rankles my sensibilities.

Mrs. Hillbilly Mom decrees that in the land of Hillmomba, no person shall be referred to as "Baby Girl" unless that person is...how you say...um...I don't know...perhaps...A FEMALE PERSON UNDER THE AGE OF FOUR!

Because it's just creepy to call a girlfriend or wife "Baby Girl." Disconcerting. Disturbing. A baby girl is a baby girl. Not a sex partner. Not a wife. Don't make me mentally label you a pedophile for labeling your significant other "Baby Girl."

If you google "Baby Girl," pictures of babies come up. Not pictures of 39-year-old barmaids with tramp stamps, tongue barbells, and toe rings.

You wouldn't call a boy "Baby Girl." Because he's not a girl! So don't call a girl over four years old "Baby Girl." Because she's not a baby! See? It's relatively simple to understand.

Mrs. Hillbilly Mom. Shoring up the pillars of society one column at a time.

2 comments:

PossumManor said...

I also detest the phrase "Baby Daddy."

Hillbilly Mom said...

Possum,
Yes. That phrase will also be banned in Hillmomba. And the Maury Povich Show, too.