Not quite the 12 Days of Christmas, but the 8 Day of H-cation will have to do. Don't get greedy and think I'm going to share all eight items at once. Not likely. I'm going to drag them out. In a torturous manner. Over eight days, perhaps.
Day 1 of H-cation: What I Won't Miss.
1. The Sheet Thief
I will not miss trying to turn in, only to discover that I am going to be sleeping on a sliver of sheet and mattress cover. We have fitted sheets. And a fitted mattress cover. How Bedmate H can usurp both every night before I get to bed is beyooooond me. Sometimes, I can tug on my edge, and gain a little ground so that I don't have to lay on a humped-up elasticky border. Other nights, I am not so successful.
Bedmate H prefers to surround himself with sheet. We're talkin' the bottom sheet. He would drape himself in sheet if it was socially acceptable. Bedmate H rolls himself into the center like a giant, overstuffed, living/breathing taquito. A humongous, XXXL, behemoth of a taquito. He spins himself around a longitudinal axis, like a crocodile rolling to drown its prey.
I am going to sleep soundly tonight, on top of the fitted sheet. There will be no deep, red indentation in my flesh when I arise to start the day.